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Category Archives: Deep Emotional Themes

Embrace Joy Over Depression With Hope and Happiness Feeling Better

Feeling Better Comes With Often Embracing Joy and Hope

Making it normal? Is it possible? Or are we talking about a “new normal” when it comes to chronic illness?

DB: I have taken the challenge to accept my ‘new normal’ over and over.

The first ‘new normal’ was for me to accept I had multiple chronic health conditions.

As time passed more complex chronic health conditions added themselves to my lengthy medical record. But time has a special way with us.

It depends on what you choose to do.

With autoimmunity there are many choices. I chose to self-educate myself through functional medicine doctors, psychologists and therapists as well as a lot of online researching.

My conclusion is a ‘new normal’ now of great health. It may not be as great as a few decades before, but it is fabulous compared to the last decade of my life.

So my ‘new normal’ has become very grateful, excited waking every morning with the new health, which I treasure daily.

Where there is hope there is healing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-uFuQpgG1A

Summary by:

Depression:

  • past losses and difficulties
  • low self-esteem
  • ‘fuzziness’ in thinking
  • negativity
  • challenges
  • sense of purpose and meaning
  • difficulty seeing a hopeful future and
  • suicidal thoughts

DB: As a teenager I suffered from depression from past losses, difficulties and very low self-esteem. I also lacked a sense of purpose and meaning which led me to suicidal thoughts.

In my early 20’s I suffered from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome CFS and in my 40’s I developed long term Fibromyalgia.

Emotional Feelings:

  • sadness
  • difficulty to access emotions
  • feeling lazy
  • lost
  • angry and
  • difficulty accessing pleasure in things that were pleasurable before but not now

Behavioral Symptoms:

  • Less excitement for activities
  • increased use of substances
  • or ‘out-of-control’ practices and escaping
  • ‘checking out’
  • housebound and bed-bound
  • reckless behavior without care of consequences
  • self-harm
  • reduced performance in work and
  • school or duties at home
  • massive drop of levels of energy

DB: Before I chose to become a Career Missionary after my suicidal thought attempt/self-harm, I felt out of control. I checked out and used reckless behavior without care of consequences, as perceived by my parents and family.

I lost my appetite, work performance and duties at home. I also endured disabling fatigue while dabbling daily with alcohol for relief.

During my suicidal intent, I was saved by a book that caught my eye. After opening the book to ‘see what it had to say to me’ was a last attempt to ward off the suicidal thought. At first glance the words offered to give my life away to a good cause, rather than throwing my life away.

Relational Symptoms:

  • socially withdrawn
  • isolated
  • increase in arguments
  • less invested in loved ones lives
  • disconnected from others

DB: Significant health issues resulted living housebound. After attending psychological therapy I have been able to slowly but surely increase my social life, being more open and more invested in my loved ones. So there is hope for sure.

Physical Symptoms:

  • stomach discomfort and loss of appetite
  • sexual issues and
  • sleep disturbances
  • lethargy and fatigue
  • slowing down and
  • headaches
  • get help from a doctor’s diagnosis of depression

DB: When I saw the doctor as a high school student I was prescribed effervescent Vitamin C. It actually helped, but the root cause wasn’t addressed. It has now been addressed through my self-education and the help of my supportive GP/Doctor.

Summary :

  • With chronic illness there is a physical loss which can lead to depression
  • social and emotional loss over long periods
  • includes loss of hope
  • physical function
  • integrity
  • dignity
  • faith
  • social relationships
  • autonomy
  • freedom and
  • ‘loss of life’ imagined
  • Chronic ‘sorrow’ and depression is very frequent with co-occurring disorders
  • Significant amount of loss can easily become depressive

Focus on:

  • Coping strategies
  • self esteem
  • optimism
  • cognitive behavioral therapy
  • interpersonal therapy
  • problem solving
  • social support
  • emotional expression
  • mindfulness practice
  • addressing toxic relationships
  • boundaries and
  • trusted support

Coping strategies include:

  • Sunlight,
  • exercise,
  • natural supplements,
  • sleep schedules and
  • medical interventions.

DB: I discovered two other coping strategies, not mentioned, CBD oil and Trauma Informed Yoga that I have found very helpful indeed to the point of almost back to normal and better.

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Make Your Loneliness Better By Making Your Health Better

Feel better overall by balancing both a social life and a balanced healthy life

Your social life may seem unrelated to your overall health.

After all, what do relationships have to do with your heart pumping blood or your muscles growing?

As it turns out, relationships have much more to do with your health than you might think!

In fact, relationships are so vital to your quality of life and your overall well-being that loneliness can be known to shorten a lifespan and cause many different health complications. Why take the risk?

Learn more about how important relationships are for your health.

Focus and work on:

-Improving existing relationships

-Building new relationships

-Socializing more

You will see a change in your mood, and then probably in your attitude. That change will begin to affect your habits and your activity levels.

Before you know it, your improved and new relationships will simply having you feeling better.

That’s good news!

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Striving To Make Your Identity Normal Can Make You Happy

Making my identity normal enough for me makes me happy

Summary by:

Identity and Chronic Illness

  • Chronic Illness can have a profound impact on our identity
  • I feel like saying: “This isn’t me. How did I come to be like this?”
  • Can’t perform our regular roles in society.
  • Source of focused identity rather than the illness
  • Disruption of self with chronic illnesses

Illness Identity:

  • Engulfment: How much does my illness engulf my life? Defining myself by my illness?
  • Rejection: Hiding my illness, not sharing it with others.
  • Acceptance:
  • Acknowledging my illness without being overwhelmed by it.
  • Difficulty coping getting engulfed by it, yet acceptance presents with less symptoms!
  • Which comes first?
  • Work on the acceptance, make it happen.
  • Incorporate the identity of illness without having it as my whole identity with enrichment.
  • Breathes less anxiety and depression, less symptoms and less pain.
  • A hyper focus required.

Enrichment: Allow myself to be positive despite the illness, enabling me to grow as a person.

Importance of Grief:

  • Grieve what is lost to us, very important.
  • Some things can be lost ‘forever’.
  • Accept and make peace with that.
  • Don’t allow myself to go into darkness that ‘all is lost’ as it isn’t realistic.
  • If we grieve over it and accept it, it can enrich our lives.
  • Relish and return to things you loved, even if you are not able to participate but enjoy anyway.
  • Example of losing ballet, seeing a ballet concert to enjoy it anyway.
  • Finding a way to validate my love of it that way.
  • Try to reclaim what I have lost and find a way to bring consistency in my life, just a different way.
  • For example: I can watch the ballet from YouTube in my bed if needed to keep the continuity.
  • Finding new ways, new passion.
  • Think in new ways and values as we age, priorities change with life experience with wisdom creating a renewed identity.

Personality Attributes:

  • Types of people is personality
  • Type A, and Hostility: Neurotic can make it more challenging for those with chronic illnesses
  • Optimistic personality makes the chronic illness more bearable with hope and positive thinking, believing a positive outcome will come of the illness and recovery.

DB: I wasn’t able to speak on stage after my chronic illnesses, but I found a way by writing blogs and eventually videos sharing all I have learnt about chronic illness and how to predict, prevent and reverse.

It began as a hobby for me to share my thoughts to others and to help grieve it all and make new pathways after acceptance and enrichment entered my life. My hope is that it will do the same for you.

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Relieving Anxiety Can Bring Tremendous Joy Into Your World

Self-educate yourself through anxiety to help you feel better

I am very familiar with anxiety and can relate to all of the symptoms mentioned in the video/summary. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JNCff-VxTY

I also found the solutions which helped me. learning through the video series above, and have come through the anxiety feeling so much better.

So, try it out like I did and see what results you discover for yourself.

Summary Notes: by Debby Blettner

Anxiety:

  • Psychological obsession
  • replaying memories
  • mental preoccupation
  • mental focus on self
  • mental rehearsals and
  • beliefs

Emotional:

  • Irritability
  • difficulty relaxing
  • fear
  • feeling ‘out of control’
  • feeling shame
  • early startle response and
  • exhaustion

Behavioral:

  • Reduced activities once pleasured
  • increased use of substances
  • general compulsions
  • “checking out” due to overwhelm
  • housebound or bed-bound
  • disturbed natural patterns
  • disturbed sleep and
  • high avoidance

Relational:

  • Social withdrawal
  • frequent arguments
  • disconnected from others
  • fear of others
  • rigid and inflexible with others or
  • too accommodating

Psychological Symptoms:

  • Living in fear
  • worried their body will fail them
  • uncertainty
  • invisibility
  • uncertainty can affect adjustments
  • partner relationships
  • depression
  • quality of life
  • Fibromyalgia and
  • fatigue

Cognitive Behavioral Approaches:

  • How to cope with anxiety
  • Managing uncertainty
  • flexibility
  • acceptance
  • expanded sense of life and self
  • consistence
  • increase self-trust
  • increase education
  • social support and
  • trusted support providers

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silhouette of woman

Let Go To Move Forward To Your Better Future

By Letting Go Of My Past I Gained A Wonderful Future

Leaving Your Past Behind

As an impulsive young adult I desperately wanted to leave my past behind.

By fulfilling my passionate lifetime future, I had to face the fact that those closest to me thought I had gone mad.

Once I met full-time missionaries, I got very excited when they shared this verse with me:

New King James Version Bible
‘Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.‘ 2 Corinthians 5:17

I boldly declared, “Old things have passed away! I am a NEW creature!”

Obstacles Affecting Your Future

It was true but…

My biggest obstacle was my family, who wanted me to stay, when I wanted to go.

Saying goodbye to them was the hardest thing I could do…so…I decided to board a bus beginning my three day, four night travel from Perth to Sydney, across Australia.

I didn’t realize the implications.

In hindsight it was not the wisest thing to do.

Abandonment To Realize Your Goal

My trip to Sydney lead to my flight to the Philippines where I eventually met my husband.

After nine years, I returned to my family in Perth, both married and pregnant. I didn’t receive the welcome I was hoping for.

Realizing The Damage

When I realized the damage I had caused, we made plans to travel over the plain to Sydney.

Our initial plan to stay for ten days was interrupted due to a transport strike, forcing us to remain for five weeks. It was so taxing on me as I was desperate to leave.

While waiting to depart for Sydney by train, I burst into tears in front of my parents observing me through the window.

They naturally perceived this emotional outbreak of sorrow, departing once again. But in reality my tears fostered anxiety due to the departure time delayed by one minute.

Health Conditions Resulting From Anxiety

My mid life cancer crisis confronted me to address my past traumas, specifically my childhood and teen years.

Multiple health conditions developed resulting in surgical procedures, one after the other.

While recovering I did some deep reflecting to review my past using re-framing from an adult’s view overriding my childish emotional view.

Spiritual Interception

An epiphany taught me a lesson from the Bible from ‘the potter’:

Then I went down to the potter’s house, and there he was, making something at the wheel. And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter; so he made it again into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to make.’ Jeremiah 18:3-4 NJKV

A gentle light filled my mind, opening a new thought pattern on my past.

I envisioned Jesus appearing at the potter’s wheel, holding a mottled lump of clay in His hands. I saw the clay was dry, cracked, lumpy and discolored.

My instinct was to throw it out but…I recognized it as my past with a touch of my present.

Epiphany

I watched His tears releasing the moisture needed to transform the clay.

As I watched Him quietly, I heard Him sing a new song. As a child I wouldn’t have understood these lyrics. Yet, as an adult I understood it clearly. It’s transforming, mesmerizing and transformative power shaped this new pot.

This new elegant pot was much stronger and more useful. It oozed gentleness and wisdom, as though it had a myriad of stories to share with the world.

My remade pot spoke of a new tale, woven from my traumatic past into a meaningful future.

I allowed the butterfly to be released from the suffocating cocoon.

As a result, I learned to fly.

Abandonment transformed into commitment, my shame to honor and betrayal to loyalty.

Life On Earth For Jesus

I’ve read that Jesus experienced these emotions personally during His life on earth.

My Commitment

As Jesus on earth experienced these emotions, so have I.

My new vessel has been refilled with new commitment.

Fresh loyalty and honor to Him who loved me enough to use my past to re-create me into a new creature.

With fresh eyes having seen my past, I now embrace all that I experienced made me who I am today.

My new vessel is what Jesus seemed good to make for me.

What can you take from your past to benefit your future? Call on an Epiphany for help like I did. Embrace what He has to show you..

Everything Has Its Time

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

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